Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
Randomize