Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
