You're completely useless in the revolution.
when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Randomize
