My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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