honey bunches of taint.
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
