We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
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