He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
i was born a porn star she said
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
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