How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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