IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
Still dying that you shit outside
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Randomize
