omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
Randomize
