On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
Randomize
