All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
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