I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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