hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
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