I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
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