great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
Randomize