I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
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