AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
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