Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
he high fived his dick after we had sex
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
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