kristin has been a bad kristin
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Randomize