On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
My day in three words: secret purse cake
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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