i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
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