at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Randomize
