Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
The struggles of a small town man whore
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
Randomize
