Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
Randomize