We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Randomize
