They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Randomize
