The good thing about walking home in a dress on sunday morning is that people mistake my walk of shame as a walk to God.
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
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