I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
Randomize