I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
Randomize
