remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Randomize
