i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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