she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
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