Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
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