So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
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