Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
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