in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Randomize
