jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
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