hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
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