i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
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