Someone shit on the floor
you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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