dude i'm inner monologue high
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Randomize
