I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
Randomize
