His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Randomize
