So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
i just pissed myself at work. maybe they'll buy the old coffee spill trick
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
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