Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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