If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
You dont lie about slip and slides
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
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