So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
Randomize
