Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(316): View more from Kansas

i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?

Fav 73 10197 2572
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(319): View more from Iowa

How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.

Fav 26 8478 1779
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(936): View more from Texas

You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home

(254): View more from Texas

Challenge accepted.

Fav 8 6588 1290
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(330): View more from Ohio

theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.

Fav 29 7267 1512
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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form

Fav 17 2396 1190
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(828): View more from North Carolina

you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.

Fav 7 1775 744
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(318): View more from Louisiana

Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"

Fav 3 1526 844
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(262): View more from Wisconsin

Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.

Fav 0 17 55
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(316): View more from Kansas

I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”

Fav 0 132 12
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