For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize